Moving forward
Nov. 11th, 2012 04:00 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
forever_wandering
女性にとって、綺麗な靴は必要な物です。綺麗な靴は綺麗な所へ連れて行ってくれる. 
For women, beautiful shoes are a necessity. They say beautiful shoes take you to beautiful places.
I recently traded up my white flats for a pair of black booties I bought when I went to New York with Ryo. They had been an impulse buy and with 11cm heels, I was sure I'd never wear them....but I've been breaking them in this week and I am absolutely in love with them. 174cm Zia get's a lot more attention and discounts than 163cm Zia, and I feel a lot more confident. Lol. In this past week alone, I've been asked out three times, gotten so many free snacks when I enter sweets shops, and have gotten $40.00 worth of free make up samples.
=> 
Unfortunately, M doesn't support any of the changes I've been making. It's like the better I become, the more distant he gets. It's like he wanted someone average with average skills and appearances to be totally dependent on him... I wonder if this was why my other friends didn't like him from the start? He does't hinder me from doing as I like, but he doesn't support me either. I'm worried that it'll eventually come to a point where I'll have to choose between him and my own happiness.
Maybe I need to hold off on relationships until I'm completely happy with myself?
I spoke with a nutritionist today to try and find a balance between the calcium rich diet I need to follow until I can have my surgery, and my low dairy diet I'm trying to follow to lose weight. Luckily, we were able to find a good balance, but he suggested I keep a food journal that measures the calcium amounts in all I eat. I figured I could keep track of calories as well. While I was shopping online for a cute journal to use, I stumbled across this page. I know several people on my friends list are also trying to lose weight, so I decided to share it =) Clicking on the picture will take you to a bigger version.
So here we go. One month left to drop 5kg! Okay, I know that 5kg in one month is impossible, so my goal is actually only 2kg for now. I'll worry about the rest of the weight when I get back home.
and as I type this, I get a text from my mom:
My sister is having her baby!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 01:58 am (UTC)Anyways, YAY!! ^____^
Woah! 11cm? I think I wouldn't be able to walk on them. On top of that I'd be way over 180cm and stand out even more in Japan, so no thank you XD
To me it sounds your stressing yourself out too much with all the diet details and stuff. Dont forget to have fun! That's also an important thing for staying beautiful! ;)
no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 03:05 am (UTC)Yeah, they take some getting used to, but they're definitely nice.
I figure now I can blend with other foreigners =D Most of the ones I see are like towers compared to me. Now I can stand side by side with them. Way over 180 with the shoes? How tall are you?
No worries, I will definitely still have fun, despite my need to diet and blah blah.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 03:08 am (UTC)How old is your sis? ^^
I'm not tall at all. I'm even the shortest in my family. I'm about 174cm without shoes, so I'd be around 185cm with those heels??!! ^^;
Even at work there's a guy who is 200cm, so I do feel quite short indeed. Luckily almost all of my Japanese co-workers are shorter than me! ^-^;
I'm glad to hear that! :3 *hugs*
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 01:36 pm (UTC)The baby is a girl and she's adorable. Later on, I'll post a picture!
174cm without shoes? I'm jealous! Being tall is nice!
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 02:09 pm (UTC)She's going to be a young mom! ^^ If I ever become a mom, I'll be a grandma ... agewise! ^^;; ....
I don't think that's tall. I wish I was a bit taller. 175-179cm would be nice. Though I would struggle even more in Japan than I already do ^^;
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 11:41 pm (UTC)Oh, is it hard? I have some tall friends, but I've never heard them complain. My old friends in Osaka hate when I wear heels, so I never did with them. I'll wear them for the first time in Tokyo soon =)
no subject
Date: 2012-11-14 01:49 am (UTC)And shoes. Being tall often means you have big feet.
I already told you that my shoe size doesn't exist in Japan, right? ;o;
no subject
Date: 2012-11-14 01:59 am (UTC)I forgot such problems exist. Since I'm short, I've never had to think about such things ^^;;; I guess if I was forever tall, that would be a problem, wouldn't it?
My friends usually shop at second-hand shops. Maybe sizes there are different? I've never heard them complain about sizes.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-14 02:17 am (UTC)I try to stock up on trousers, tights, shoes, long sleeve shirts whenever I visit back home! ;)
no subject
Date: 2012-11-14 07:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 02:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 03:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 02:19 am (UTC)You've got a great body chicky, I tend to use pilates as well just to tone up have you done them?
no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 03:06 am (UTC)Pilates is something I haven't really tried yet. I always assumed it was the same as yoga, which I do practice.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 08:53 am (UTC)11cm heels heels look great, but are a disaster to my knees. I wear them once in a blue moon, but can't do it every day...
ahhhh.... diet..................... need to get started....
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 01:38 pm (UTC)Yeah, I would imagine they are bad for one's knees, but fashion is fashion, I guess lol. I don't think I'll wear them for more than two weeks at a time though.
Dieting during the holiday season is so hard!
no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 09:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 01:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 12:27 pm (UTC)Congratulations to your sister! That's lovely!
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 01:39 pm (UTC)Yeah, she and I aren't at all close but I'm very happy for her. The baby is adorable!
no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 02:35 pm (UTC)Those boots are beautiful! I have a pair that are a little similar only with gold buttons instead of the clasps... now I want a pair just like yours too!
It's a shame M isn't supportive... you do get some men who don't want their girlfriends to be "better" than them and prefer the girl to have to depend on them. Hopefully he's just having to adjust to the changes and will become better at supporting you. Fingers crossed!
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 01:44 pm (UTC)Ooooohhhhhhhhhhh Gold buttons!!?? That sounds lovely. I wonder if I should get some too =P
What is it about shoes like this that make a woman feel strong?
Well, he still makes a lot more than I do. I wonder if he feels threatened because the better looking I become the more he feels like I might drop him for another guy? Even when we're together, I often get approached...I dunno.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-12 05:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 01:45 pm (UTC)The baby is precious!
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 12:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 01:46 pm (UTC)I guess pressure gets the best of me. It's hard to feel beautiful when you're constantly surrounded by these Asian girls that look like they come straight out of a magazine.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 09:12 am (UTC)I don't know what to tell you about M, you'll just have to follow your own heart there. Do what you think is best.
The pages seem helpful. I've never measured myself during diets before, though. I usually just weigh myself. Recently I don't even do that. I'm just trying to eat healthier in general lately which I think has been good for me.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 01:49 pm (UTC)For a while, I was going by the fit of my clothes, but now all my clothes are too big, so it doesn't help to measure by those. Once I have clothes that fit again, I'll probably go by the fit.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 05:15 pm (UTC)How much is 5kg in lbs...
But eather way you look GREAT!!
And Congrats to your sis for the new baby, now your an aunt! :D
no subject
Date: 2012-11-13 11:40 pm (UTC)Thank you!
no subject
Date: 2012-11-14 07:54 pm (UTC)I can see why you'd like those boots and a few extra inches never hurts.
With M I'm not sure what to say. I suppose at this point you just need to decide what you want to do and if you really feel you need to be more comfortable with yourself to be in a health relationship.
That page you posted should come in handy with helping me managed my own diet properly (it's so hard for me to cut back on peppers but I really have to at this point). Thanks! :3
no subject
Date: 2012-11-15 02:55 pm (UTC)I'm glad the sheet will be of use to you! I've been using it and it's nice!
no subject
Date: 2012-11-15 02:15 am (UTC)You look great!
Those boots are so fierce! ♥!
no subject
Date: 2012-11-15 02:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-16 05:35 pm (UTC)haha more confisent! you go girl xD
if I'm higer I feel less confident, I hate high heals xDD
okey I'm a bit taller than you 166 cm, but still xD
honestly in this situation your happiness is more important, what he do, isn't support or even "healthy" relationship..
you can have good relationship if you happy with yoursela dn when other respect you for who you are and what you do!
good luck with loosing weight!! I supprot u <333333333
I need to gain more musles on my stomach and hips (I'm opkey with my weight right now) I feel a bit of fat there hahahah