forever_wandering: (Candy Girl)
First, congratulations to my sister on finally giving birth to a beautiful baby girl! My parents are really excited about finally having a grandchild, though they are not so excited about being considered "grand-" in this case, hehe. Our almost non-existant relationship aside, I wish my sister and her new family all the luck in the world.


Lately, I've been busying myself with this and that. With only about a month left until I have to go back to work, I've been trying to get myself used to being on a set schedule again, and it sure isn't easy! I start my day at around six in the morning and end it at around midnight. I've purposely locked myself out of my bank account to keep myself from going on any more wild adventures for a while. I spend my days studying random things to keep my mind sharp, cleaning, and sewing clothes to make them fit again (and let me tell you, sewing by hand is not easy!) Occasionally though,  I do take a small side trip to relieve my stress! 

This time, it was a somewhat healthy Asian-meal and an acrobatics show! 


Seeing shows like this always make me hate myself because then I think "Darn it! Why can't I do stuff like that!!!??" 
forever_wandering: (AMUSED)

For women, beautiful shoes are a necessity. They say beautiful shoes take you to beautiful places.

I recently traded up my white flats for a pair of black booties I bought when I went to New York with Ryo. They had been an impulse buy and with 11cm heels, I was sure I'd never wear them....but I've been breaking them in this week and I am absolutely in love with them. 174cm Zia get's a lot more attention and discounts than 163cm Zia, and I feel a lot more confident. Lol. In this past week alone, I've been asked out three times, gotten so many free snacks when I enter sweets shops, and have gotten $40.00 worth of free make up samples.  

White shoes=> shoes

Unfortunately, M doesn't support any of the changes I've been making. It's like the better I become, the more distant he gets. It's like he wanted someone average with average skills and appearances to be totally dependent on him... I wonder if this was why my other friends didn't like him from the start? He does't hinder me from doing as I like, but he doesn't support me either. I'm worried that it'll eventually come to a point where I'll have to choose between him and my own happiness. 

Maybe I need to hold off on relationships until I'm completely happy with myself? 

I spoke with a nutritionist today to try and find a balance between the calcium rich diet I need to follow until I can have my surgery, and my low dairy diet I'm trying to follow to lose weight. Luckily, we were able to find a good balance, but he suggested I keep a food journal that measures the calcium amounts in all I eat. I figured I could keep track of calories as well. While I was shopping online for a cute journal to use, I stumbled across this page. I know several people on my friends list are also trying to lose weight, so I decided to share it =) Clicking on the picture will take you to a bigger version.

United bees "GRAM NOTEBOOK"

So here we go. One month left to drop 5kg! Okay, I know that 5kg in one month is impossible, so my goal is actually only 2kg for now. I'll worry about the rest of the weight when I get back home.


and as I type this, I get a text from my mom: 

My sister is having her baby! 

forever_wandering: (RELAXED)
It's only noon and I'm already itching for the day to end. I found out my sister is engaged--through someone else. I'm not jealous or anything. I'm just really annoyed that I had to find out through a third person. When I tell family that my sister and I don't speak, they always look at me in shock and ask why we don't. She's the one blocking me out, and although I don't care anymore, it is really annoying that people keep acting as though it's my fault. Everyone tells me to invite her to visit me in Osaka...But my sister won't even invite me to her place in Hawaii while I'm in the US. What makes them think she'll want to spend time with me across the globe? 

Anyway, after I finished ranting to my BFF about that, I logged on to livejournal to catch up with people who actually matter, and I see that apparently, I was over my bandwitdth limit with photobucket, and everything was basically gone. I paid for more bandwidth for just this month, since it resets itself on the 22nd of this month. It's  funny how much this account has come to mean to me. My heart nearly dropped when I saw everything was down. 

Where do you store pictures and such? 


It was far less rushed than our first few days. 


Our day started off at Hard Rock. R had known about Hard Rock--the museum--but hadn't known that it was actually a cafe, so as soon as I told him, he decided we'd eat there. He ordered this huge burger ( I swear it was a full cow!), I ordered salmon and vegetables, and we split Nachos and desert. We ended up getting so full that we actually didn't eat anything else the entire day. The waiter we had kept crowding us, coming back every few minutes to ask if we needed anything else. He'd show up after what felt like every three bites. It kind of made it a little hard for R and I to have any real conversation.....

He told us he was bored and needed something to do every time he came back. You know, had I ever said "I'm bored," at my old job, my boss would have found so many things for me to do, I would have dropped from exhaustion. 

Ladies and gentlemen, let me tell you that Hard Rock Cafe's salmon is the best salmon ever in existence. Having lived in Sitka, where the economy was run by Salmon fishing, I've had my fair share of fish, so I can confidently say this fish takes the cake. Go out. Buy it. Eat it. Enjoy it. I enjoyed it so much I could barely walk after we finished eating, so R dragged me off to see the Chelsea Market. We regretted getting so full at Hard Rock because there were so many delicious things to eat there. I told R I didn't care about gaining weight and that I could easily tackle that Elmo cake as long as I had a bit of milk, but in all honesty, I couldn't eat another bite without knowing I'd pop. 
Being our last day in New York, we wanted to do something fun and out of the ordinary, so R said we'd go to Blue Note, which is apparently a famous jazz club for Japanese people. The music and drinks were amazing. R told me he thought I was beautiful and kept asking me if I wanted another drink as soon as I finished one. I worried he would try to take things to the next level (which I didn't want) but surprisingly, he was a complete gentleman through and through. 

New York was so much fun! R kept saying he'd love to live there. I loved it too, but I know that if I were to move there, I'd grow to hate it. We plan on going back again sometime in the future. This time however, we'd like to go during the summer so we can hit Coney Island.

Oh, I woke up this morning to work out. When I turned my TV on, one of my favorite TV shows was on. I won't say what show it was or what it was about. I'll only leave you with an image. I'm sure you'll figure it out =) 

Boy Meets World Pictures, Images and Photos
forever_wandering: (Default)
Every time someone hears that I blog on Livejournal, they roll their eyes and say "Well, whenever you feel like blogging seriously, join blogger." What exactly is "blogging seriously," anyway? Blogging for fame? I don't get it. In any case, it reminded me that I really want a new layout....


Even though I told her to take the day to go out and spend time with my dad for Mother's day, she still came back to bring me food, thinking I'd starve here on my own. The beauty of it? The "food" is actually just a bunch of cakes, puddings, and cookies. She knows I'm on a diet. I know she knows. That's why she had that grin on her face as she handed me the tray. I see what you did there mom. I see it. I ended up eating the rice pudding and a piece of cake. They were so good! 

I need to learn how to add videos to my posts There has to be a less annoying way than uploading to youtube first.

Hope everyone had a Happy Mother's Day! 

1 Hour cardio: Alternating between hill walks and running. 
30 Minute Muscle training 
20 Minutes Yoga. 

forever_wandering: (HAVING FUN)

Tomorrow is Mother's day, so I decided that today, while my mother was out getting her hair done, I'd clean the entire house. It was a lot more work than I had expected it to be...But in the end it was very worth it. The house looks great! Tomorrow, mom and dad will go out together and I'll stay home doing something or other. Mom wanted me to spend the day with her since I've been out of the country for the past few Mother's days, but I really want my parents to finally have a Mother's day on their own to go do couple-stuff. 

I gave mom her present early. My mom loves Disney, so I've always made sure to give her different Disney items for Mother's day. Last year, I gave her a Minnie/Mickey mug set (Which she still hasn't used! She only puts them on her collection shelf!). This year, I got her a Lion King snow globe. 


I saw the globe when R and I went to see the Lion King Broadway musical while in New York, although I had thought it was perfect for my mom, I wasn't sure whether or not I wanted to actually buy it, since it was $30.00. In the end, R convinced me to buy it and he seemed pretty proud when I told him how happy mom was with it. 

So. Broadway. R had been dying to see a show on Broadway and I had been dying to see the Lion King, so we got tickets as soon as we could. Each ticket was $145.00. R ended up paying for the tickets with his card, but I ended up giving him cash later. He used the cash to then take me to dinner, so I guess I still owe him?The show, for the most part, was pretty enjoyable. I had been excited to get seats so close to the stage. However, the woman in front of me was wearing this hideously large hat that blocked quite a bit of my view of the left side of the stage. Grrr.....! R offered to switch seats with me, but I didn't want him to miss out. Anyway, it was still pretty great. The music was AMAZING. 

Before going to Broadway, we went to Little Italy! By now, R was confident enough in his English to do all the ordering and such himself! 
forever_wandering: (RELAXED)
Hi! This week has been exhausting, but I survived! I increased my work out to 4 miles (2 running, two power walking up-hill), and added 10 minutes of yoga. I was also a little depressed over finding out via Facebook that my sister planned a family reunion in Hawaii that I wasn't invited to, but I decided not to think about it too much. 
  I leave for New York in a few days and I still have a million things I need to do before I go. I made a long list in my schedule book. I'll start tackling the tasks tomorrow. Tomorrow I'll also be giving myself a hair conditioning treatment! My hair has been getting a lot better since I stopped using all these heating products. Sometimes, I get tempted to Chemically straighten my hair, but then I remember how damaging it is...

I also narrowed my make-up kit to five simple items! =D I'm going to go with more simple make up this time around. No fake lashes or bold colors. When M-san was here, I wore no make up at all. I felt so naked, but I liked how natural I looked in the pictures. I'm going to try to keep that look with my make up now. I'll keep the flashy make up for the club scene.


There is also a wig in my closet I need to re-style for days I don't feel like brushing my hair. Haha. Oh Jesus, am I getting that lazy? No! If Lolita girls can wear wigs when they want, so can I, damn it. 
I keep getting calls from someone in Puerto Rico. I don't know who they are but every time I answer, they say "Ei ma, que hace?" Hey girl, what'cha doing? I have a few guy friends still in Puerto Rico, but he doesn't sound like any of them, and I figured that after a week of creeping me out, they'd finally confess and laugh at me for freaking out.  I thought about blocking the number but it's almost 6 dollars a month to keep that one number blocked. That's $72.00 a year on someone I don't know...

That's money I have but don't want to spend at the moment. I just finished paying $300.00 at an evaluation center to get my transcripts from フェリス女学院, Rosemont and UAS combined. I should have done this a long time ago. I was two courses shy of completing a degree at 
フェリス女学院. I was one course shy of finishing a degree at Rosemont. Courses I took at UAS had been for fun so I never expected credit for them, but it turns out I can. Now that the three have been combined... catch this....if I take only two more courses, I can end up with two different Degrees. I guess the $300 was worth it.  I need to e-mail Ferris and arrange to take those two courses.  Even with a degree though, I don't know if I'll look for a different job once I go back. I kind of liked working at the restaurant I was at before. The pay was decent and my co-workers were tremendously kind. I'll call Kanae once I get back from NY and see what my chances are of going back to work there. Until then, I should have fun and practice my "いっらしゃいませ~”'s~! 
forever_wandering: (ASHAMED)
You know those girls who stare in the mirror and see themselves as ugly fat women, no matter how thin they actually are? It dawned on me today that I might be becoming one. Today I tried on--and finally fit in to--a dress I had bought months ago. I had fallen in love with it the minute I saw it, so I bought it, despite it being several sizes too small. I told myself that I'd lose weight, fit in to it, and be the happiest person alive. Today, I should have been that happiest person alive. I was able to slip in to the dress and zip it up without a struggle. I had finally achieved my goal. The first thing to cross my mind however, as I stared at myself in the new dress was "God, I need to lose more weight." 

Now, I'm the first person to admit I need to lose weight. But I'm so disappointed that instead of enjoying the accomplishment of my first goal, that was all I could think about.  

PhotobucketNow that I've lost weight, not only can I comfortably fit back in to the clothes I brought with me, but I also have a lot of old clothes that are so big, I'm able to cut and stitch and wear in different fashions.  So, I've started looking at magazines again to see how I want to re-work all these old pieces.  The sewing machine is out and ready to go! I've never done anything like this before, so I'm interested in seeing how things turn out. 

It disappoints me that most of the styles I absolutely love require heels. By American standards, I'm short. By Japanese standards, I'm tall. Whenever I wear heels, I'm the same height (give or take a few inches) as a lot of my friends, and they hate that... so I've been trying to work them out of my wardrobe. 

When the boys are happy, I am happy. They do after all buy me nice things, feed me and take me on trips. Oh goodness, am I really a call-girl like that one person said?! 

PhotobucketI managed to pack everything I need for New York in to this little travel bag, and I still have room left over. I packed: 
★ 4 outfits with interchangeable pieces, totaling out to 16 different combinations. 
★ I set of PJ's. 
★ Hair iron. 
★ 4 pairs socks/undergarments.
★ Brush, Make up, toiletries.
★ Sunglasses .

I'll also have a second purse with my wallet and camera and things like that. Does it look like I'm missing anything? Since I always pack way more than I usually need, I'm looking at this list and keep thinking that I'm forgetting some important things. Of course I'm going to unpack and re-pack since I still have time, but I want to make sure everything is perfect. I wanna save all my money for omiyage! 

I'm feeling kind of nervous about meeting with R-san! Like I said, we've actually hung out together without anyone else being around, and now we'll be sharing a hotel room for about a week. 

I spoke to K-san about our August trip. It's going to be a three day trip. I don't feel like running around for three days, so I'm thinking I'll try to find some place that will take us three days to explore. I need to start looking at hotel rates, car rental rates...ect. Hm, I wonder why I always get stuck planning these little excursions? I've already won K-san's love and affection, so I'm more focused on what S-san wants to do during this trip. He likes historical places, New York, and Russia. Hm...I've never been to Russia....

Speaking of trips...I was originally supposed to go back to Osaka in December, but now I'm thinking about going back sooner. I found out my brother will be coming down to FL for the summer. I think I've mentioned it before, but I have a horrible relationship with my brother and sister. Basically, they don't acknowledge my existence. My siblings and I were never particularly close but my moving to Japan made us grow even further apart. The final blow was when I went to Alaska and snapped at my sister over her drug use that everyone seemed to be ignoring. My brother, being close to my sister, took her side. They talked to me for a while after the big Earthquake and Tsunami, but a few months after that, I guess they brushed me off again. 
Because they are both the babies of the family, whenever any of them are around, I'm automatically the evil child. Things get intense. I was really looking forward to more time with my parents but...I don't know if I'm going to stick around.  
forever_wandering: (HAPPY&EXCITED)

Kotatsu Pictures, Images and Photos

 It really is hard to be productive when the conditions around you are so perfect for being lazy. However, that feeling you get when you realize you've finished everything and still have hours left in the day is amazing. Hopefully, tomorrow will be just as productive. After I finish everything that absolutely has to be done & the planning I need to do for my friend's visit, I want to type up and post all my journal entries I have written on paper. I haven't posted any of my real adventures since the Kyoto trip, and I really want to before I forget about them.  I also need to post all the entries about my road trip across the US a
couple months ago.... I'm so far behind! 

I started watching "Let's watch the Meteor Shower" today, which is the Chinese adaptation of Hana Yori Dango. I've been a Hana Yori Dango fan since my first year of junior high, so watching this drama, despite not being able to find it anywhere with subtitles, was an absolute must. Even with the lack of subtitles, I'm following the story quite well and am falling in love with it.


Valentines day is right around the corner. Some of my guy friends have been dropping hints but this year I've decided that I'll give chocolates to myself and no body else. I know it's perfectly acceptable to give chocolates to friends, but giving chocolates to myself this year has a special meaning for me. This year, I've really come to love and appreciate myself so much more. The love that I used to whole heartedly give to others, I will now give to myself.   I want to celebrate this feeling by confessing to....Myself. It might not make sense to most people, but it makes sense to me. 

I talked to mom and there's family drama all over the place. It seems that family from Puerto Rico has been calling her all day to find out just what happened between the two cousins that fought. One cousin called everyone in Puerto Rico to whine and complain, but the other has stayed relatively quiet about the whole situation, so the entire family is feeling rather confused. Since mom is the closest, they expect her to be in the know....But mom wants nothing to do with it. I feel like manning up for her, calling everyone and telling them to back the hell off. 

My FAIL for the day: When speaking Japanese while I'm half asleep, I tend to mix up my ぎ's and き's. Today, Yuta asked me if I needed anything. I meant to tell him I needed my うわぎ、my coat. What did I tell him I needed? うわき. Extramarital sex. 
He offered me a cookie instead. 




"An ugly duckling growing out of her feathers."

Hello. I'm Zia, and this is most obviously my journal. I write about my life between Japan and the US, and all the adventures I find myself in. People often say they are envious of the life I seem to live, but the truth is, I feel a little unsatisfied with it myself, so I've decided to do something about it--to find what really makes me happy. Hopefully by documenting my life, I can figure out where I need to be heading. This journal is my way of opening my world to those around me in hopes of meeting people searching for the same thing or encountering people who have already gone through this kind of struggle. 

Back in my high school days, I used to be a bit of a nerd. I was really in to comic books of all kinds, action figures...all that jazz.  These days, though my interest in comic books re-surfaces every so often, I'm very much more in to things like fashion, dance, music, travel, tea, baking, writing letters, photography, animals and fitness. I'm a straight shooter--meaning I do not (or rather, can not?) lie. Keeping up with lies is too much trouble. 

Anyway, there is more information about me on my profile. Feel free to take a look there or catch me on another site★


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